Here at Population Paste, we’re about more than just grossing you out. We’re about education, and yes, even helping people. No, really. We are.

With that in mind, I’m going to give you a break from the usual ungodly horrors of our site and bring you an informative public service announcement - specifically for the ladies.

Not to rub it in girls, but the ability to pee standing up is one of the better perks of being a dude. It’s fun, it’s easy, it’s convenient, and we even have our own special toilets designed just for the occasion. Aren’t you jealous? Of course you are. After all, the best you can really do is pull up your meat and spray like so, which is bound to make a mess. So what’s a girl to do? This little device might just hold the answer:

Yes, Magic Cone™ is a small disposable funnel that cups around your pee patch and guides your urine outward, allowing you to stand up and project your stream much like a man does! But don’t take it from me - I’ll let the fantastic broken English of the Magic Cone™ website describe this revolutionary device’s many benefits:

Magic Cone is a means through which females can urinate in standing position.

Magic Cone helps you to be less undressed, while urinating, comparing to the ordinary ways.

In schools, discos, restaurants and all public and gathering places, Magic Cone is amazing device.

Okay, so obviously now you’re sold - you’re ready for your own Magic Cone™. But naturally, you’re afraid. What if you do it wrong, and get pee all over yourself? What if everyone at the disco laughs at you? Thankfully, Magic Cone™ has enlisted First Lady Laura Bush to demonstrate the usage of Magic Cone™ for you:

Thanks Mrs. Bush - but like your husband’s answers to difficult questions, those instructions were a bit vague. Maybe the Bushs’ drunken First Daughter Jenna can clear things up a bit in this step-by-step animation explaining the proper usage of Magic Cone™. Really, please click that. It’s amazing.

That brings our public service announcement to an end. And since I feel a little uncomfortable posting something (arguably) non porn-related, here are some fun pictures of girls peeing standing up without Magic Cone™ - courtesy of the fine folks at Pissing In Action (my favorite is the third one, where she’s happily peeing on some frat boy who’s clearly responding with “yo, what da fuck brah??”):

Posted in bodily functions at 12:01 am